a chat with mich while watching tonight's oc. so awesome.

[20:11] Mich: Um, this chick on the OC is totally ripping off Whatserface from Gilmore Girls
[20:11] Mich: PAris
[20:11] FloraJasmine: i know
[20:11] FloraJasmine: thats exactly what i was thinking
[20:12] FloraJasmine: she seems even more psychobitch tho
[20:12] FloraJasmine: i love this kid
[20:12] FloraJasmine: he looks like my middle school boyfriend
[20:12] Mich: lol
[20:12] FloraJasmine: bad eyebrows
[20:12] Mich: Even thier sucky school is nicer than most schools
[20:12] FloraJasmine: haha
[20:12] FloraJasmine: it looks like mine
[20:12] FloraJasmine: the new seth
[20:12] FloraJasmine: this is so lame
[20:13] FloraJasmine: he's from some other show
[20:13] FloraJasmine: hahaha
[20:13] Mich: LOL
[20:13] FloraJasmine: this is sooooo lameeeee
[20:13] Mich: I know
[20:13] FloraJasmine: i want her purse tho
[20:13] FloraJasmine: soo very much
[20:13] Mich: eww
[20:13] FloraJasmine: i like how he's her dad
[20:13] Mich: Flora its ugly
[20:13] Mich: hehe
[20:13] Mich: He looks so old
[20:13] FloraJasmine: picking her up in the range
[20:14] FloraJasmine: her purse is not ugly
[20:14] FloraJasmine: its cute
[20:14] FloraJasmine: uh oh
[20:14] Mich: Fo, its hideous
[20:14] FloraJasmine: i hope he follows her
[20:14] FloraJasmine: i so want to see elizabethtown
[20:14] Mich: oh noes, shes making friends in the whitepeople ghetto
[20:14] FloraJasmine: even tho i think neither one is cute
[20:14] Mich: which is that?
[20:14] FloraJasmine: hahaha
[20:14] FloraJasmine: the legolas/ kirsten dunst movie
[20:14] Mich: oh oh
[20:15] Mich: oh womanlooking Orlando
[20:15] Mich: I still love him
[20:15] Mich: in his girliness
[20:15] FloraJasmine: i dont think hes cute
[20:15] FloraJasmine: i dont understand it
[20:15] FloraJasmine: did i tell u about the donnie darko boy at my office
[20:15] Mich: no?!
[20:15] FloraJasmine: just the other day i was like, aww you're looking so cute
[20:15] FloraJasmine: thennn he's like
[20:15] FloraJasmine: yeah, i'm driving down to syracuse this weekend
[20:15] FloraJasmine: to see my girlf
[20:15] FloraJasmine: DAMMIT
[20:16] FloraJasmine: lame
[20:16] FloraJasmine: all decent boys have girls
[20:16] Mich: I know
[20:16] FloraJasmine: all boys that have crushes on me- not my type
[20:16] Mich: awww
[20:16] Mich: did I tell you I dont know if I like my boy anymore?
[20:16] Mich: :LOL
[20:16] Mich: The commercial
[20:16] Mich: did you see that
[20:16] FloraJasmine: which one
[20:16] FloraJasmine: no
[20:17] Mich: The hammertime one
[20:17] FloraJasmine: nope
[20:17] Mich: Life comes at you fast: Nationwide
[20:17] Mich: it had MC hammer making the mone
[20:17] Mich: y
[20:17] FloraJasmine: oh, i think i've seen it
[20:17] Mich: so funny
[20:18] Mich: So what is "going out"
[20:18] Mich: define thsi for me
[20:18] FloraJasmine: something you do in high school
[20:18] FloraJasmine: "dating"
[20:19] FloraJasmine: going out w/ one kid for a while
[20:19] Mich: oh florita, my relationship dictionary
[20:19] FloraJasmine: hahaha
[20:19] FloraJasmine: i know so much
[20:19] FloraJasmine: for making out so little
[20:19] FloraJasmine: that is the most gigantic louis ever
[20:20] Mich: I know
[20:20] FloraJasmine: i'm going to get one
[20:20] Mich: She's moving on without you ryan!
[20:20] Mich: NO
[20:20] FloraJasmine: a little one
[20:20] Mich: Flora
[20:20] Mich: you and your fugly bags
[20:20] FloraJasmine: yes
[20:20] FloraJasmine: loves it
[20:20] Mich: LESBIAN
[20:20] FloraJasmine: i know
[20:20] FloraJasmine: this is so gross-o
[20:20] FloraJasmine: star trek lesbian
[20:20] Mich: nononoooo
[20:20] Mich: :O
[20:20] Mich: 7 of 9?
[20:20] FloraJasmine: lame lame lame
[20:21] Mich: thats her?
[20:21] Mich: wow
[20:21] FloraJasmine: hahaha
[20:21] Mich: woooo
[20:21] Mich: what is going on?
[20:21] FloraJasmine: ooh, who's that
[20:21] FloraJasmine: scandalous
[20:21] FloraJasmine: bitch patrol
[20:21] FloraJasmine: lame
[20:21] FloraJasmine: sweater
[20:21] Mich: Paris!
[20:21] FloraJasmine: gay
[20:21] FloraJasmine: lame
[20:21] Mich: is it me, or does se look like she's got som ahana in her?
[20:22] Mich: like a 1/4 or somethign?
[20:22] FloraJasmine: perhaps
[20:22] FloraJasmine: some brownness
[20:22] FloraJasmine: this is so lame
[20:22] Mich: The OC is going downhill I feel
[20:22] FloraJasmine: so far downhill so very fast
[20:23] Mich: Im a man. I make teh money!
[20:23] Mich: Git in da kitchen Kirstin
[20:23] FloraJasmine: she makes good quiche
[20:23] FloraJasmine: quiche grosses me out
[20:23] FloraJasmine: this is so dame
[20:24] FloraJasmine: lame
[20:24] FloraJasmine: shes being a lame dame
[20:24] FloraJasmine: hahahahahaha
[20:25] Mich: poor summer was never very smart
[20:25] Mich: liar
[20:25] Mich: LIAR
[20:25] Mich: you POOR bitch
[20:26] Mich: wow
[20:26] FloraJasmine: ilovehim
[20:27] Mich: She's going to make out with him and then the other girls going ot put a hit out on her
[20:27] FloraJasmine: haha, she's such a lame little rich girl
[20:27] FloraJasmine: hot
[20:27] Mich: You dont laugh about that shit
[20:27] Mich: she should go crazy on her ass
[20:27] Mich: I though that gave her street cred
[20:27] Mich: I though that was GOOd
[20:28] FloraJasmine: haha
[20:28] FloraJasmine: shooting people is hot
[20:28] Mich: Yeah bitch, I shot the fool. You wanna be next? ::chestpuff::
[20:28] Mich: :O
[20:28] FloraJasmine: oooh
[20:28] Mich: ohhhh
[20:28] FloraJasmine: it's so on
[20:29] FloraJasmine: ryan knows how to deal on the streets
[20:35] FloraJasmine: oh my, lesbian $$ laundering
[20:36] Mich: BITCH
[20:36] FloraJasmine: oh man
[20:36] FloraJasmine: she's evil
[20:36] Mich: stop stop
[20:36] Mich: dont listen!
[20:39] Mich: THis show is pissing me off
[20:39] Mich: shes gonna go drink
[20:39] Mich: OMG
[20:39] FloraJasmine: i know
[20:39] FloraJasmine: ooh
[20:39] FloraJasmine: see ryan
[20:39] FloraJasmine: see ryan get mad
[20:39] Mich: Uh OHHH
[20:39] FloraJasmine: he's so her dad
[20:43] FloraJasmine: this elija wood hooligans movie
[20:43] FloraJasmine: i love that charlie fellow
[20:43] FloraJasmine: he's so brithot
[20:45] FloraJasmine: i've never been to a school dance in a gym
[20:45] FloraJasmine: except for the dance marathon at bc
[20:45] Mich: you missed out
[20:45] Mich: did you see that?
[20:46] Mich: 2 whole black people
[20:46] Mich: go ahana
[20:47] Mich: ooooo
[20:47] Mich: I want to beat the bitch DOWN
[20:47] Mich: OHHH
[20:47] Mich: ooooh
[20:48] FloraJasmine: omigod
[20:48] FloraJasmine: lamelamelame
[20:48] Mich: not a lezbo
[20:48] FloraJasmine: i need to start getting ready
[20:48] Mich: going out?
[20:48] FloraJasmine: yeah
[20:48] Mich: you suck
[20:48] FloraJasmine: drinky drink time
[20:48] Mich: where to?
[20:48] FloraJasmine: who knows
[20:48] Mich: with who?
[20:48] FloraJasmine: the boys want to do bowling at jillians
[20:49] FloraJasmine: jen and diane just wanna bar/dance
[20:49] Mich: I need cooler firends
[20:49] Mich: aww
[20:49] Mich: old people
[20:49] FloraJasmine: i love sandy
[20:51] FloraJasmine: I LOVE SETH
[20:52] Mich: I want her to catch bitch and the dean making out
[20:52] FloraJasmine: ooh. i hope she takes scandalous cam phone pics of paris and the dean
[20:52] Mich: this show is too predictbable
[20:52] Mich: if we both came up wiht that
[20:52] FloraJasmine: here we gooooo
[20:52] FloraJasmine: phone in hand
[20:52] Mich: text with free pix and messages
[20:52] FloraJasmine: damn
[20:52] FloraJasmine: no pics this time
[20:53] FloraJasmine: she'll be next door to startrek
[20:53] FloraJasmine: hear the evil plan
[20:53] FloraJasmine: yeah?
[20:53] Mich: not over her obnoxiously loud crying she wont
[20:54] FloraJasmine: hahaha
[20:54] FloraJasmine: oooh no, i only have this little bag of luxury goods left
[20:54] FloraJasmine: summer looks cute today
[20:54] FloraJasmine: not as cute as seth, obvi
[20:54] Mich: sell that junx on ebay
[20:54] FloraJasmine: right
[20:55] FloraJasmine: lame
[20:55] FloraJasmine: lamer
[20:55] FloraJasmine: lamest
[20:55] Mich: your going to miss scrubs?
[20:56] Mich: !! have you seen that kitchen confidental show?
[20:56] FloraJasmine: it's been lame lately
[20:56] FloraJasmine: come have sex w/ me eyes
[20:56] FloraJasmine: oh baby
[20:56] FloraJasmine: was this song in napoleon dynamite?
[20:56] Mich: dont think so...
[20:57] FloraJasmine: oh
[20:57] FloraJasmine: it is from ND
[20:57] FloraJasmine: at their school dance
[20:57] FloraJasmine: i googled it
[20:57] FloraJasmine: i'm so smart
[20:57] FloraJasmine: forever young
[20:58] FloraJasmine: hot hit of '93
[20:58] FloraJasmine: when he says, i like your sleeves
[20:58] FloraJasmine: they're really puffy
[20:58] Mich: he said that?
[20:58] Mich: need to rent tha movie again
[20:58] Mich: need more llama. And ham
[20:58] FloraJasmine: tina
[20:59] FloraJasmine: come get some ham
[20:59] Mich: Step up napolean
[20:59] FloraJasmine: slap!
[20:59] Mich: ::runrunrun!!::
[20:59] FloraJasmine: aight yo
[20:59] FloraJasmine: gotta bizzounce
[21:00] FloraJasmine: ps, i am so posting this convo to my blog
[21:00] FloraJasmine: it was hilarious
[21:00] FloraJasmine: bye ace
[21:00] Mich: have fun for me
[21:00] Mich: stopid whore
[21:00] Mich: :P

it's saturday night and i'm in bed thinking.

i'm trying not to think deep thoughts. cos deep thoughts, late at night, all alone either freak me out, scare me, or make me depressed. so instead, i try and focus on other things. not so deep things.

like why i'm home alone, listening to norah jones and typing on my blog. hmm. i really need a boy in my life. a local boy. to spend time with. i have roomates and friends to hang out with, go to bars with, shop with, go dancing with and talk forever with. but i dont have a boy. to do boy/girl stuff with. it's a sliver of my life that is missing and i need to fix that. only i haven't figured out how yet. a solution that is a miles away is not a real solution.

also. winter is coming. yes yes, i know, fall just started. but dangit, it's cold. i have to sleep with socks on already! maybe if i closed the windows in my room i wouldnt be so cold, but i do like the fresh air. just not the chill of it. it's beautiful outside, with the sun shining. but as soon as darkness comes, the cold sets in and i remember why i hate boston. winter. winter is coming. dammit.

at least i'll get to wear all my fun boots. thats my favorite part of winter in boston. that and the drunken escapades in the snow. but somehow i feel that me not being in college will severely limit my drunken escapades in the snow henceforth. maybe not. considering how much time i still spend at the damn campus these days.

still so weird. the fact that i'm a college graduate. the fact that i'm not living in texas. the fact that i live 2 miles from that place i thought i hated so much. i mean, i still do hate some parts. other parts i love. lots of kids i like and love, i met them there. so thats good. and buffalo chicken wraps from late night- i love them. i haven't had one this semester yet. what's going on?
i cant believe i'm not living in texas. i wish i was. i am happy here. i like my job well enough, i like my living sitch, i hate the massive amounts of driving, but considering i'm a just some new kid on the block- i think things are all ok. only the nagging feeling, like a tug on my shirt-tail, pulling me back towards home. my real home. south texas that i know and love and miss. i haven't scheduled a flight home yet. i know i'll go down for thanksgiving. and then after that? christmas. but for how long. a couple of days at the most? not the usual month long break i've enjoyed the past 6 winters. so weird. i can't handle not seeing my family for months and months. i know for other people its normal and nbd. but for me its serious. i talk to my immediate fam every single day. and to my grandparents at least once a week. i need to see them, hug them, kiss them more often then once every 3 or 4 months. or 5 or 6.

my favorite soon to be non-juvenile delinquent is supposed to come up in october for a weezer concert. but if he doesnt come, i'll definitely fly south, if only for a couple of days. i need it. i need to see the 'rents and my superhero and my puppies. and everyone else i love down in san antone. and my heb and taco c's and lbj park and the hill country and st.pius church and everything. i miss it all. i miss the smell i miss the dirt i miss the smiles and the y'alls.

basically. i'm in bed, listening to norah jones on saturday night. being homesick and boysick. sick.

maybe i should move on to thinking deep thoughts. real depression instead of this self centered stuff. make the night even better.

another month... more stories.

i'm adapting to life as a working adult in boston, mass. it's been weird. but already, mostly comfortable. i'm used to my 3 roomates who crack me up with their tales of drunken accidents and the horrors of being a 13 year old boy. i have all my stuff thrown around my spacious room in my little yellow frat house. i have trainspotting in my vcr and napoleon d sitting in my dvd player. my dearest bc seniors, jen and diane, are only a few miles down the road.

with a solid crew of bc grads and other cool analysts at the office, i'm rarely bored or lacking in a snack buddy. my boss is so laid back and cool. and today he confessed he worked one night as a green day roadie back in college. my hard ass boss who most other people are scared of happens to like me and always give awesome feedback.

i have season fball tix to bc. so thats 6 fun saturdays i have in order. the first game was this past weekend. i went w/ kel and beav. we weren't drunk but we were into it. we stayed til the end and cheered even as bc had completely stomped army for 47 points. good times.

there is also this boy. that i've been talking to. i totally think he's the coolest kid and like talking to him. but i'm not sure whats next. i dont know if its because i want something more, in general. or he is sending signals that he wants something more. i cant figure out where we are. are we just friends? do i want to be just friends? does he? i dont know. and he's far away and that's part of the problem. i think i just need to be in the same room as this guy for a bit and then i can figure out what is going on. if only we could get into the same room. sometime soon. i know we'd have fun either way. cos hes a cool kid. and obviously, 2 cool kids have lots of fun when they're together. i'm attracted to his personality and to his wit. physically, eh, he's not what i'm usually into. so just personality but not physical. that means just friends right? i dont know.

it's weird because with other people there is like an instant physical. and i definitely have a type. skinny. tattooed and pierced and plugged. a little bit arty, a little bit snobby. someone more focused on their passion rather than their bank account. someone who would pick a thrift store tee and beat up sneaks over a polo and flips. that's the kind of guy i see and am like, omigod, i want you.

like my newest crush- a cute boy with half inch plugs in each ear, a platinum and black fauxhawk, the bluest eyes, and secret tattoos he only told me about but didnt show me- who works at the h&m downtown. we chatted as he rang me up on sunday afternoon while diane made googly eyes at me from just a few feet away. he's a kid that i can say, oh yeah, i'd totally hook up with him- who care's if he actually does go to berklee or has bigger dreams post-h&m. it's a completely superficial physical attraction to a certain type. i thought i was over it. apparently not. i'm still a punk addict who love boys that make my parents cringe.

i figured that being surrounded by young men in pressed khakis and oxfords every day would make them grown on me. and seeing some at the bar in their more casual pressed oxfords, sleeves folded up, worn untucked over $200 jeans and flip flops did make me think, 'aww, he's cute'. i'll talk to him and see whats up. he buys me a good local beer and we chat and he's cool and even cute and it's good and i think oh, what a nice boy. but if i see a kid lurking in the corner with headphones wrapped around his neck wearing dirty chucks- ithink, oh man- 'how can i get to know him!' even if he never even looks in my direction. so sick. i am.

i need to find a boy who wears oxfords to work and vans to the bar. the bar w/ a live rock band and not a juke box playing classic rock. let me know if you find one. and give him my number.

or point him to my little yellow house. my roomates are always looking for new buddies to hang out with as well.